Christmas on Kamino
by Pasha Pasha
Summary: Zam decides to bring some Christmas cheer to the Fetts. Fluff abounds. R&R appreciated.
1. Santa Better Watch His Back

K amino had to be the least festive place in the galaxy, Zam decided. The perpetual rain never turned to snow, the halls always remained silent and sterile, and the native Kaminoans wouldn't know holiday spirit if it round-house kicked them in the face.

To be fair, Christmas was a relatively new development. It had become popular after the natives on some obscure planet had been found celebrating it. Of course, the hipsters and sensationalists had grabbed onto the concept, and branded the celebrating of it the culturally sensitive, and more importantly, cool thing to do.

Honestly, it just looked fun to Zam. The decorations were funny, the customs were funnier, and who didn't like presents? That was all the logic she needed to go out and buy what she considered to be a Christmas starter kit with decorations, presents, and a hologram of an evergreen tree. She grinned to herself as she walked through the luminous corridors of Tipoca City, occasionally warranting a wary glance from a passing Kaminoan. Kaminoans were notoriously xenophobic, so the idea of celebrating a holiday derived from what the considered an inferior culture probably repulsed them. _Their loss, _Zam thought dismissively.

She came to the monochromatic door that marked the entrance to the living quarters of the Fetts and rang the doorbell. A Kaminoan answered. "May I help you?" Taun We asked, her voice unchangingly melodious.

"Is Jango here?" Zam asked, craning her neck to look around the apartment. She could see little Boba sitting on the floor with a sheet of flimsi and a few crayons, but there was no sign of his bounty hunter father.

"Jango is currently away." Taun We said, a hint of disapproval entering her voice, "You'll have to come back later."

"That's okay." Zam said with a shrug, "He's probably terrible with decorations anyways." She pushed the Kaminoan aside and entered the apartment. Boba looked up and smiled, "Hi Zam." He said, not seeming to notice the offended Kaminoan behind her.

"Boba," Taun We crooned, "Do you know this female? Would your father approve of her presence here?"

"Yeah, she's our friend." Boba said, a bit guardedly, "She can stay if she wants to." Zam looked smugly back at the Kaminoan, who simply glided away, radiating disapproval. Zam turned back to Boba who had resumed coloring. How old was he again? Six, maybe? Human aging always puzzled Zam. While Clawdites had brief, independent childhoods, human children took more than a decade to mature and were very vulnerable during their early life stages.

"What's all that stuff for?" Boba asked, pointing to the bags of ornaments and brightly colored papers held in Zam's hands.

"Ever heard of Christmas?" Zam asked. Boba shook his head. "It's a holiday," Zam explained as she placed the bags on the floor, "And on this holiday, legend says that a fat man dressed in red and white comes down through the chimney and leaves you presents." Boba looked skeptical.

"What if you don't have a chimney?" He asked.

"He, uh, teleports or something." Zam said. Boba still looked unconvinced. "Does he give presents to everybody in the galaxy?" He asked.

"Yeah, unless you're naughty in which case you get a lump of coal."

"Wouldn't all those presents and coal be too heavy for him to carry?"

"Oh, well, he's not actually a man." Zam said, spinning the story as she went along, "He's actually a droid, so he can carry all of those presents without getting tired. I think he's called Santabot or something."

"Who built him?" Boba asked.

"Elves." Zam said vaguely, "So, what are you drawing there?" Appeased, Boba held up his picture for Zam to see. "Oh, it's Slave I!" Zam said. She paused, "Is that a person under it?"

"It's a Jedi being squished." Boba giggled. Zam laughed, "Your father would love that!" Boba smiled proudly and walked over to Zam, peering down at the bags she had brought. Zam quickly brought a concealing hand over the merchandise, "Hey, no peeking!" she said, "Some of the stuff in there is supposed to be a surprise." Boba's eye's widened, "Can I see?" He asked.

"I'll let you see later." Zam said, "For now, do you want to help with decorating? It's customary to hang plants and red ribbon around the house on Christmas." She could almost see the question forming in Boba's mind, "To, uh, catch Santabot." She deflected the inquiry before it could leave his mouth. Boba seemed satisfied with this ambiguous answer for once. He glanced around before whispering conspiratorially to Zam, "If Santabot is real and we _do_ catch him, can we take his presents?" Zam laughed, "I like the way you think, kiddo." She handed him a bunch of fake evergreen vines and a roll of red ribbon, "If we manage to catch him, we'll split the loot fifty-fifty. Deal?"

"How about I take all the presents and you can keep the coal?" Boba suggested slyly. Zam smirked, "Okay bounty hunter, " She said, "But I expect a couple of presents for myself as a finder's fee."

"Deal!" Boba said, sticking out his hand. Zam struggled to keep a straight face as they sealed the deal with a handshake.


	2. Two and a Half Bounty Hunters

"Boba, this could be the start of an excellent bounty hunting career for you." Zam said, beaming at the 'decorated' apartment. It wasn't so much decorated as strategically adorned. Boba, believing that the decorations could help capture Santabot, had tactically strung the decorations across all of the exits and entrances of the apartment, effectively trapping any decoration repelled entity that happened to teleport into the quarters. Boba looked proudly at his handiwork, "Do you think it'll catch Santabot?" He asked. Zam smirked. "Maybe. Santabot's pretty hard to pin down." Boba nodded solemnly as if they were talking about a real hunt. "What kind of ship does Santabot have?" He asked.

"Um, well… Somebody told me that he piloted a magic sleigh pulled by Christmas banthas." Boba sighed exasperatedly and shook his head, "Zam, you can't believe _everything_ people tell you." Zam stifled a laugh, "Yeah, I guess you're right, kid." The sound of the door opening caused them both to look around. "Dad!" Boba scrambled to the door like an eager akk pup. Jango, still in full armor, looked bewilderedly around the festively ornamented room.

"Dad, me and Zam are gonna catch Santabot and make him give us presents and coal and-" Boba paused, seeming to remember that bounty hunters weren't supposed to be excited or happy when presented with a professional situation. He cleared his throat, "I mean, me and my, um, contact will try and, uh, apprehend the bounty known as 'Santabot,' in order to, uh, steal his… merchandise?" He looked back at Zam as if for confirmation. Zam gave him a grin and thumbs up. Boba looked back at his father who was currently trying to get past the web of artificial vines and ribbon without wrecking the décor. "Is that what all of this is for?" Jango asked, managing to duck under the remaining vines and enter the room. Boba nodded. Jango looked at the rest of the bedecked apartment and suddenly smiled, "I don't know why you chose plastic vines and ribbons to do it, but you have efficiently cut off any points that a mark could use to escape." Boba smiled happily at the praise, "Santabot can't get through vines or ribbon. Zam told me so." Jango looked up at Zam who just winked impishly. "And we don't have a chimney, so Santabot will have to teleport in, but once he's in, he won't be able to get out until he gives us all of his presents." Boba explained. Jango once again turned to Zam, who now had her hand over her mouth to hide her grin. "Santabot?" Jango mouthed perplexedly.

Boba didn't seem to notice his father's confusion. Like most boys, he assumed his father knew nearly everything.

"Boba," Zam said, "Why don't you go see if you can get the holo-tree to work? Your father and I will discuss the Santabot situation."

"Okay, Zam." Boba said, "But why do we need a holo-tree to catch Santabot?"

"Uh, I'll tell you later, okay?" Boba nodded and turned around. Zam waited for him to get out of earshot before smiling at the bemused Jango, "So, I'm guessing you've never heard of Christmas?"


	3. Festive Flirting and Tree Troubles

**((Thank you to everybody who's read and the few people who have reviewed. I really appreciate it! It makes me feel warm and fuzzy. Anyways, sorry if this was posted a bit late. I've been having internet problems since I'm visiting relatives for the holidays and my computer keeps kicking me off due to time limits. However, thanks to a little hacking, I have managed to post this from my brother's account. Happy holidays and I'm planning on there being two more chapters to this little story before completion, so keep watching for updates!))**

By the time Zam finished explaining to Jango exactly what Christmas was, Boba was finished setting up the holo-tree and Jango had a look very similar to the skeptical gaze Boba had worn a short time earlier. "Christmas banthas, Zam? Really?"

"Okay, well the original idea was he had a sleigh pulled by an unknown species called 'reindeer,' but I figured it would be easier to just go with banthas, so…"

"And Santabot? Where did you hear about that?"

Zam was about to reply when she saw a sly glint in Jango's eyes. She shoved him playfully, "You're making fun of me!" she accused.

"We both know I'm much too professional for that." Jango said innocently, "I'm just asking questions."

"Well for your _professional_ information, Christmas is actually a semi-legitimate holiday and you could do with celebrating it. I mean, look at you! You wouldn't know holiday spirit if it-"

"Round-house kicked me in the face?" Jango interrupted.

"Good guess." Zam said, a sly look appearing on her own face, "Actually, I was going to say you wouldn't know holiday spirit if it," she paused, smiling cattily, "Kissed you on the lips," As far as flirting went, the line was pretty tame for Zam. Subtle even, considering that what she considered flirting usually consisted of blatant confessions of romance and very public displays of affection. Usually, Jango shied away from the budding romance between them. This time, he decided to go along with it. "Well, I guess there's only one way to find out, isn't there?" The comeback wasn't all that witty, but Zam smiled nonetheless. For a moment, the distance between them seemed to close and they both seemed to forget that they were 'professionals.'

"Dad, the holo-tree projector is asking me what the 'contrast levels' should be! What should I put?" Boba's voice interrupted from the other room. Zam gave Jango what looked like a wistful smile. She pushed his shoulder lightly, "Well, go help him!" She said with a smile, "Wouldn't want him breaking anything, would we?"

Jango blinked, regarding Zam as if his eyes had just been refocused. Then, he simply turned and walked into the other room to help with the tree. Zam was left standing in the room, staring at the wall. After a couple of minutes, she realized she was still smiling stupidly at nothing. She silently berated herself for acting like a naïve, love struck teen. She may have been a flirt, but that didn't mean she was ignorant or unseasoned. After all, she killed most of her targets using seduction… and explosives, but that usually came later. However, when it came to Jango, she found herself using cheesy pick-up lines and transparent declarations more and more often and it was… unsettling. Brushing the thoughts aside, she entered the room and watched as Boba and Jango put the finishing touches on the holo-tree, adjusting the contrast, color, and size until it was just right. After a few painstaking minutes of tweaking and turning, the tree was done. Boba stood back, admiring the finished product. He looked so proud, Zam was surprised he didn't finish with a flourish and 'Tah-dah!' Instead he turned to Zam and asked, "What do you think?"

Zam's smile was genuinely sentimental, "It's perfect."


	4. Killing Time Until Christmas

**((The next chapter will be posted tomorrow, which will be Christmas. At least in my time zone. I hope you all get good presents!))**

"Zam, when is Santabot getting here?" Boba asked, staring out at the stormy sky. The 6-year old had been checking the window periodically since he had finished decorating and it didn't take a Jedi to know he was bursting with impatience.

"Boba, Santabot doesn't come until night time. We'll all probably be asleep by then." Boba walked away from the window and sighed. "What time is it?" He asked.

"It's 7'o clock." Zam said, "What time is your bedtime?"

"8:30." Boba said. He glanced back at the window again. "Zam, if we're all asleep when Santabot gets here, how will we capture him?"

"Well, after Santabot teleports in here, the decorations you set up will keep him from escaping. Then, uh, well I guess somebody will have to tell him to give us presents. I guess you can leave that to your father and me. If he's back by then." Jango had been called away on urgent business with a client, much to Zam's annoyance. Even bounty hunters should be home for the holidays. Especially bounty hunters, Zam thought. It wasn't right to be dealing in death on Christmas.

"Maybe we should leave him a note." Boba suggested.

"Leave who a note?" Zam asked, woken from her thoughts.

"Santabot. We can leave him a note telling him to give us presents. Then once he's given us presents, he can wake somebody up to let him out." Zam decided that now wasn't the best time to explain to Boba that not all bounties followed an honor code. "We could do that. Do you wanna go write it?" She asked instead. Boba nodded, already reaching for his crayons on the shelf.

Zam sighed and looked at her chrono. What did people do for fun on a planet where it was always a rainy day? Boba had books and holos, but most of them were too childish for Zam. Jango spent most of his time training the ARC troopers and increasingly Boba how to fight, but obviously, Zam lacked the authorization or expertise to do either. Zam's mind wandered tediously as she stared at the blank white ceiling. She heard a cough and looked down to see Boba, holding out a sheet of paper and a few crayons. "You can draw with me if you're bored." He offered. Zam smiled and got up from her chair. She sat down on the floor next to Boba, feeling a bit foolish as she looked down at her blank paper and wondered what to draw. She smiled as she thought of what to do. Picking up a crayon, she drew a large, uneven shape that was supposed to be a sleigh, followed by some brown, shaggy forms that were supposed to be banthas. Boba watched her draw curiously. Suddenly, he picked up a crayon and added a red and white figure in the sleigh. "Don't forget Santabot." He said. Zam just smiled and continued drawing. Every once and a while, Boba would reach out and add another detail; horns on the banthas, an extra ornament on the sleigh. Eventually, he ran out of practical things to add to it. So, instead, the next time he reached out to draw something, he drew laser cannons on either side of the sleigh. Zam laughed, "Good idea. Santabot needs to be protected against bounty hunters like us." Zam added some sharp spikes to the bantha's horns. Boba added knives sticking out of the side of the sleigh. Zam put some extra armor on Santabot. By the time they were done, Santabot and his banthas were armed to the teeth and Boba and Zam were grinning wickedly at their festively lethal creation. Santabot looked like he could take on an army of starfighters and win with all his presents intact. "We should get that framed." Zam chuckled, glancing at her chrono. It was almost 8:30. "Looks like it's time for you to start heading to bed." She said. A look of excitement passed over Boba's face. "Can I stay up to see Santabot?" he asked eagerly.

"No can do, kiddo." Zam said, "Santabot only visits when everybody is asleep. He measures brainwaves." Zam had to say, she was getting pretty good at coming up with Santabot related explanations. Boba looked a bit disappointed, but still went to bed without protest. Zam smiled and walked back into the main room. She saw Boba had placed his note for Santabot under the tree. Careful not to change its position, she looked over the messy note. _"Dear Santabot,"_ it began. Actually, 'dear' had been crossed out. Boba had probably decided it didn't sound bounty hunter-ish enough. "_If you are reading this, it is because you have teleported into my house and can't escape. The only way you can escape is to give us all your presents. If you do, you can wake somebody up to let you out. They will only let you out if you give us presents. Don't try anything, because we're all bounty hunters and can beat you. Thank you, Boba." _ Zam spent the next few minutes trying to control her laughter.


	5. The Perfect Gift

Zam was woken by an excited shout coming from the main room. Smiling, she stretched and got out of the chair she had ended up falling asleep in. She knew Boba had just seen the myriad of presents under the Christmas tree. She had placed them there herself. "Zam!" Boba's voice called, "Santabot left us presents! A lot of them!"

"I know," Zam chuckled, "I was the one he woke up last night." Zam walked into the main room, where Boba was already tearing open his presents like a nexu with a prey animal. Zam watched him indulgently. His wrapping paper massacre ceased for a moment to look pensively at a small, unwrapped package he had picked up._ I don't remember putting that there_, Zam thought. "Santabot left one for you." Boba said, handing it to her. Puzzled, Zam inspected the box before opening it and pulling out a slip of paper and a beautiful ornate amulet. Zam looked alarmed at the expensive looking object, turning it over in her hands. There was a blue spherical gem in the center, held by a silver encasement that had been crafted to look like twisted vines. Zam noticed a thin line running straight across the sphere, untouched by the encasement, splitting the amulet in two halves. It looked like some sort of crack in the gem. Perplexed, Zam pulled carefully at the top half of the amulet. The amulet opened up, revealing a complex array of tiny wires surrounding a small black button in the center. Warily, Zam pressed down on the button, not sure what to expect. With a sudden buzz, a field of blue energy suddenly surrounded her, shimmering uncannily. "Whoa!" Zam exclaimed, almost dropping the amulet in surprise. Boba looked up, startled. His eyes widened upon seeing the strange aura encircling Zam, "What is that?" He asked in awe.

"It looks like… a shield? Kind of like the type droidekas use…" Zam pressed the button again and the shield dissipated. Zam looked down at the note that had come with the amulet. '_Your armor was always too flimsy anyways. Love, Jango.' _The note had been written hastily, almost embarrassedly and it was all the more endearing for that. Zam smiled as she slipped the note into her pocket and fastened the amulet around her neck. Boba seemed to have recovered from the initial surprise of the object's powers and went back to opening his own presents, though something told Zam that she'd be spending a lot of time today explaining why Santabot had given her a miniature shield generator instead of coal. Zam sat down on a seat by the window, looking out at the churning ocean. The planet hadn't changed from yesterday. It was still cold, wet, and bare. But somehow none of that mattered. There was still no place she'd rather spend her Christmas. Kamino _was_ the least festive place in the galaxy. But you'd never know it in here.

**((Fin! I hope you all enjoyed my fanfic. Maybe I'll do a Hanukkah one next year, seeing as I'm Jewish. Anyways, merry Christmas and may all your presents be awesome!))**


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